the cavalcade of broken body parts
Since Sunday I've been battling a cold. Not a big deal. I usually eat these fuckers right up and this one is your standard cough cough, sneeze sneeze type. I've been drinking hot toddies and taking dayquil and don't feel all that bad. Truthfully, I shouldn't have played soccer Tuesday night but had I missed the game my team would have been drastically short. I spent the first 45 minutes playing goalie and trying to stay warm. Whenever the ball came near me I'd just blast it as far forward as possible. At the very end I decided a few minutes in the field might be nice. I made it all of ninety seconds before tripping and landing square on my right knee. The diagnosis? A scrape and a contusion plus general soreness. I woke up yesterday morning feeling better about my cold and stiff in the knee. My buddy Kelly had organized a team called Godzilla's Revenge for a charity soccer tournament benefiting Japan so I was set to play again last night and told myself I'd take it easy. A few minutes into the third game some gorilla man on the other tried to shoot from 25 yards through traffic, about the most ineffective tactic possible on a small goal. The ball made it maybe five yards before slamming into the side of jaw and knocking me to my knees. The game didn't quite stop, but quite a few people were concerned. I was seeing stars and thought my jaw might have been broken. After a bit I was able to figure out that I wasn't bleeding and the stars kind of went away and the only long term damage seems to be a sore jaw and a loose molar and it kind of feels like my bite is misaligned. We finished that game and I played in the next with few problems. After that we had one more to go and it was maybe thirty seconds in before I tried to step through a challenge and took a knee straight to my quadriceps, maybe six inches above the bruise on my knee. For the second time in forty minutes I was all fucked up on the field. I hopped off and walked the injury out and managed to play in the second half, even clearing a ball off the goal line. It's all fun when you're warm and loose and it was horrible when I got up this morning and nearly fell the first time I put any weight on my leg. I'm working now, in an office chair, with one leg shooting straight out under my desk. The consolation to all this misery was winning our bracket of the tournament. My leg will heal and my jaw will stop hurting and I'll always know that Godzilla's Revenge got the job done.